If you’re a parent of one or more boys, you’ve discovered that boys take an odd delight in breaking out of standard conventions and doing things that seem a bit - well, primitive.
Like peeing in the woods.
Even if there’s a perfectly suitable bathroom 125 feet away, most boys will be more than happy to drop their drawers when and where the urge hits them, and go “au naturel” before any and all watching flora, fauna, and bemused (or horrified) parents.
If that’s your kid, then be relieved as he relieves himself. He’s normal.
Boys, you see, have an innate need to not be confined. While everyone knows that all males eventually need some degree of domestication, all boys/young men/men also need to periodically toss aside certain conventions and let it all hang out, so to speak. While it might not be best to encourage such behavior in the middle of a crowded mall, a quick pee in the woods never hurt anyone.
Boys need rules, of course. But they also need room. Room to hit things with sticks, room to wrestle for no reason, room to explore and conquer, room to escape the careful order of domesticity and go make a mess somewhere. Boys need to jump off branches, scrape their knees, chop wood with an ax, and occasionally, pee in the woods. Channel the energy and drive as best you can, but don’t stifle it or try to alter the wiring. Confident men who can lead are simply grown boys who pushed the limits and were allowed to “prove” themselves.
There’ll be plenty enough confinement and “domestication” later, when work and family responsibilities descend. Tame what you can while they’re little, but give plenty of leash also. Enough to reach behind that tree in the woods, where your little boy (and sometimes even your grown man!) delights to pee on occasion…
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Amen to this! Quick question: Does this go for other bodily functions, too? (Burping, farting, spitting and snot-rocketing come to mind)
I love this line, Steve: “Room to hit things with sticks, room to wrestle for no reason, room to explore and conquer, room to escape the careful order of domesticity and go make a mess somewhere….”
As the mother of a boy, I totally agree.. even though there was a time in our lives when I didn’t quite get that. I banned weapons for a time in our house, when my oldest boy was a preschooler, because I wanted to raise a nonviolent, gentle boy. Of course, he had his own ideas: Every stick he picked up in the backyard became a rifle, every twig a sword. I gave up the morning he chewed his toast into a handgun and started shooting his little brother.
p.s. And by the way, I have always told my daughter, “Real girls pee in the woods,” because any girl worth her salt (in my book), also *can* pee outside, even if she doesn’t embrace the idea with the same gusto boys do.
Thanks for the funny reminder that boys are just…well, gross. However, I must say it irks and saddens me that stories like this highlight how we inadvertently repress our girls by not encouraging such freedoms. I beg all moms to henceforth to forgo social acceptance and allow their girls to pee (and burp and fart) whenever and wherever they want too.
I should also have mentioned that boys like to do things that are gross. Just because they’re gross.
RT @swoodruff Dear @howestweet Read this - roof, woods; same thing!! “Let Them Pee in the Woods” [link to post]
- Posted using Chat Catcher
I caught my little brother - who was about six — peeing nonchalantly out of his second-story window on night. I was 16 — and was MORTIFIED. We couldn’t figure out why the bushes were dying over on that side of our house. He had decided that it was easier for him to do that than go downstairs at night. It made sense — plus it was fun.
I’m a new mom of an 18 month old boy who is re-schooling me in the art of boyhood. While he is too young to pee on trees, he delights in tackling everyone..throwing stuff…yelling “POW BOOM BAM”… and hitting things with sticks (or whatever else is in his hands) and turning EVERYTHING in his sight upside down with destructive joy. I marvel sometimes at how innate is!
I guess, with my own mix of humor, horror and delight, I do my best to give him the freedom he needs to express himself without killing anything or anyone. I will remember your counsel when it is time to let him pee in the woods.
Ha ha! Yes, I’ve done that once too, the peeing out a top-floor window thing - brilliant fun.
There’s a small risk with showing a boy how to pee outdoors: they suddenly want to do it all the time! Our middle child did it once when out in the country, then enjoyed it so much that he kept doing it when he got home - racing out to the back garden to pee into the hedge! Yuck.
@Leigh - oh, you have plenty more adventures ahead, believe me!
@Ann - one of my sons reminded me that boys can also pee-write their names in snow (assuming it’s not a name like Wadsworth or something)…a trick girls definitely cannot pull off!
@bad parent - what I have found is that all attempts to suppress every outward expression of bodily functions is futile. You may try with an oldest boy, but with each child, your ideals move downward rapidly. Soon you just hope there isn’t a snot-rocket at a wedding reception. That counts as a victory!
Cute post Steve. Just to reiterate what Ann H. mentioned, I also have a four-year-old daughter who loves to have a “nature pee” when we are hiking or in the woods. Unfortunately, she thought this nature pee could occur anywhere outside so often asks to pee in neighborhood parks or downtown areas:) She would also be envious of the “aim” method, so no writing names in the snow!
Hi there,
Thanks for article. Everytime like to read you.
Bodyc
Great reminder about how important it is to just let kids - boys and girls - be kids.
My daughter ran right by the bathroom, out the door to pee in the backyard the other night. Great practice for camping season - maybe we should cook our hotdogs on sticks tonight.
I have a 6 year old boy (Steven) and a 10 year old daughter (Annie) they peed in the bushes last night