I’m a Dad of five (boys). I’ve had 20 Father’s Days now, with the standard cards and Boston cream pies (my favorite) and low-key ackowledgements that generally accompany Father’s Day. Hey, it’s not Christmas or Passover or…well, Valentine’s Day. It’s “just” Father’s Day.
So, how can you make your man feel special - not only on Father’s Day, but throughout the year?
Tell him something he’s doing right.
If I’m like most men - and I suspect I am - we feel pretty often that we’re the biggest frauds that ever walked the planet. These kids are supposed to look up to ME, and model themselves after ME? Sure, you know you’re a jerk when you’re in college, but you REALLY come to understand what a bozo you are when you have kids. It’s downright intimidating.
Maybe your guy doesn’t articulate it quite so plainly, but most of us are haunted by a deep sense of inadequacy for This Daddy Gig. And as the kids get older, guess what - the perplexity increases, not diminishes.
I guarantee that the father of your children has plenty of flaws, and certainly you could list them off in double-time if you were so inclined. But, don’t. Make his day by telling him something you appreciate - something he does really well. Let him know about a character trait that he has that you fervently hope your children will share. Understand that underneath whatever layers of bravado he chooses to wear, there’s a fellow in there who really wants to hear, “Attaboy!” Because bringing up kids in these treacherous times is really hard, quite frankly.
Then do it again the next day. Lord knows we need it.
