Maybe it’s a stretch to say I like funerals. But I do like it when the family of the newly departed speak publicly at a service, sharing stories or memories, and giving a sense of the person (if you didn’t know them) or — if you did — the depth of the loss.

So often, it feels to me like a chance to reconcile a kind of truth about the people who are part of the story of our lives — a truth that’s hard to acknowledge when someone is still alive and, say, still swigging milk out of the fridge carton or endlessly forgetting to put down the toilet seat. It sums things up, one final time, at the end: This is who they were, this is what they did, this is the way they made a difference. It’s a chance to remember that all the smaller annoyances and petty grievances don’t really matter, and what matters is the history we write together, and the way a life is lived.

In other words, I love it when people own their own rituals — be it birth, death, or one of the many life passages in between. I was reminded of that when I saw this video in which a St. Paul couple put their own spin on the traditional wedding march. I don’t know Jill and Kevin, but I found this at my friend Sonny Gill’s site, and you might have already seen it elsewhere: The video has been making the rounds of the internet lately because it’s pretty terrific.

I love the nonconformity of Jill and Kevin’s approach, and the fun vibe, and the celebration of it all. But what I love most is the way that this couple owns every second of the start of their life together.

There’s a good lesson in here — for life passages, for parents, for our kids, in business, in relationships, and so on: What if, instead of doing things to way they’ve always been done, just because they’ve always been done that way, you spin it in a fresh, new way? What then? What if? Business types call this being “remarkable.” But really, it’s all about trying an uncommon approach that can rise to become something extraordinary.

Oh — and please share any rituals you’ve owned (or seen owned) below. I’d love to hear about them.

Not my daughter, but what she'll be wearing...

In exactly 4 days, 14 hours and 15 minutes, two moms, a three-year-old (The Loaf) and a two-year-old (Snack Pack) will start the long drive to Baltimore. The occasion is my older brother’s wedding, and the drive is not the only trek that will be made.

You see, beyond the 8 hours it will apparently take us to get to Maryland, The Loaf and Snackie, will be walking down the aisle. The Loaf in a tea-length white satin number, Snack in a full tuxedo — vest and bow tie included.

For the car ride, we’ve dowloaded loads of stories on the iPod along with the usual collection of musicals (Godspell and Hairspray are the tunes du jour). We have coloring books, toys… and the mini-DVD player with storybook videos in case of emergency (our kids don’t watch TV). Oh, and food — lots of food.

That’s a pretty good arsenal, right? Yes, this is our first road trip over 3 hours.

But the other journey is another story. I’m convinced the kids won’t walk down that aisle laced with strangers on each side, my wife is sure they will. I’m, horrifically, appearing in this show as well — in a real life bridesmaid’s gown, courtesy of David’s Bridal. And, I’ll be behind them in the procession. Patti — I can only assume — will be back there getting them ready… or perhaps dangling chocolate ice cream at the other end of the aisle.

Consider this post your before picture… wherein I’m totally open to your suggestions about how to make this all go down in a good way.